Fog has rolled into my life this week. On Monday, March 4, I received the phone call I had hoped I would never hear in my life. The words "you have breast cancer" just made my mind become a blur. I heard all the words the doctor was saying but I had a hard time with processing the information. Then came the call from a lady called a nurse navigator, Janie. This all took place in a 3 hour window of time! (She will be my GPS on this journey.) Immediately appointments were made with a breast surgeon, oncologist and a MRI for follow up information. Whew....fog was blurring my vision.
The breast surgeon appointment was Wednesday, March 6. I had a day to gather all the information I could find on the web! Anyone who knows me knows I have to be in control and this made me think I was prepared for anything he said. I thought the fog is going to lift today and I will have plans in place. I had my notebook ready with instructions to Rick to write down everything so I could refer to it later. (Of course, my "secretary" had to be reminded to write as the doctor was talking.) I would say the meeting was more a "meet and greet" time. I am getting use to sitting on a table with everything "hanging out" or I should say "hanging low"! Dr. McGroskey had reviewed the pathology report and the mammogram and said that the cancer was very curable. I thought yes the fog is lifting. He didn't feel anything in my lymph nodes but I still had the MRI scheduled for Thursday. He discussed all things that could happen but no plans were made. Just more information to process and more fog to roll in. I wanted a plan!
Today, March 7, I had the MRI. Once again a new experience for me....undress, hang out boobs, get IV and be wrapped like a mummy to go through the tunnel. Needless to say I had to take a Valium! After an hour I was done and off to visit with Janie, the nurse navigator. Wow she may be my GPS but I kept hoping she was going to say "destination is ahead on your right". Instead I went through so many turns I needed to put on the fog lights again. She went over the pathology report so I could understand it. The right breast has a tumor 2.9 cm. It is larger than I originally thought. It is a fast growing cancer both invasive and non invasive. (Meaning some has spread outside the ducts into the breast tissue.) It is 100% ER positive and 55% PR positive. This means that the cancer will respond to hormonal therapy. But still no answers as to surgery plans. Janie made more appointments with a radiology oncologist and plastic surgeon. I left from there thinking about what is REALLY going to happen next.
Once again the phone rang with Janie reporting results of the MRI. Nothing much different with the right breast but now there are two spots on the left breast they need to exam again. Tomorrow I am off to have an ultrasound to exam those spots closer. The fog closed in on me this afternoon and I had to stop my journey for a bit...under the covers.
I will continue to blog as I get more information. I know I should be thankful that the medical staff is trying to make the right decision for me but I am not real patient. It is hard for me to remember I am one of many that is going through this same process and hoping for the same results. As Rick said if it were up to me I would have told them on Tuesday I am having a double mastectomy Wednesday and been home for recovery today! I need to remember God is in control and not me. I have a very strong faith and know He will be with me on this foggy journey.
Many of you have wanted to do something. Let's just get the plan in place and then Karlene will help with some suggestions of what you can do. Wow....did I really say someone could do something for me????
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